I'm Badd at posting regularly. I hope this joke goes unnoticed (sort of). You can thank my cousin Justin for any terrible wrestling related postings. Thanks, Justin!
So, first I was feeling very serious. Then, I was sick and whining. Now, I have company.
Three relatively bogus excuses for not blogging? Si, señor, but there they are.
This passed month, I've had my first trip home, which was way too short and spent somewhat unwisely, had a site-seeing-weekend-turned-hibernate-in-fancy-hotel-room-weekend in D.C., and have touristed with Kate, Elliot and presently, Mom. I've been practicing my languages by watching subtitled anime and German films, as well as the Spanish channel, and perfecting the art of sleeping whilest standing upright in the shower.
I'm tired, and should be asleep, but I had to get this out there before it left my brainspace and before I continued to procrastinate.
Without further ado, I bring you an updated version of: A Yank's Guide to Interpreting Common Greetings and Phrases of Virginians
1. Howryewh?
Roughly translates to, "How are you?" could possibly be a duality, meaning more of "Hello." Since often times strangers say it to you in public spaces while passing before one could possibly have the time to respond something along the lines of, "I'm doin' jus fiine, thank ye kindly. Howryew doin'?
2. Wareboutsheeat?
I have come to believe this to mean "Where abouts are you at?" However, also translates to "Where about is she at?" referring to any animal or baby, regardless of gender, a boat, a car, a truck (clearly very different from a car), a fancy television, or any other number of things having to do with farm machinery.
3. Country mile
See earlier posting for full elaboration, but basic meaning is that whatever it is, you live far fucking away from it, but it is still closer than the closest grocery store.
4. Haller, Holler, Hollow
See earlier posting again for full elaboration. Butchering of the word Hollow, used by people to describe areas in East Nowhereseville populated by hallerfolk, or the nicer version of the creepy families you think of in backwoods Appalachia.
5. Low Water Bridge
Concrete slabs thrown across deep, swift moving rivers, wide enough for one car and can withstand the weight of one car with full capacity, plus 5 adult sized human covered in their own excrement, as the thought of crossing the bridge caused them to relieve themselves.
6. Warsh
Self explanatory, and not uncommonly heard in New England, this extra "R" sounds like Thor's Hammer smashing the Allspark while he is wearing The One Ring. One of civil mind would prefer to interupt those who may use this term and use other terms preemptively, such as clean, cleanse, bathe, rinse, launder... or just to say "WASH" extra loudly with clear enunciation to perhaps bestow some wisdom upon the lesser human who was about to assault your eardrums. Is it clear that I am not a fan of this one?
I will be keeping this list updated, so watch for that, and I will definitely be posting post visiting this weekend. Probably Monday, since it will be 92+ degrees and humid. I'll be sitting inside, with a leopard print long-sleeved microfiber adult onesie on, in front of the air conditioner, enjoying my inside time.
O-genki desu ka? Hope you are all well and doing fun shit for the three day weekend!
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